Sometimes the internal blogging gets going, sometimes it gets weird. If you have a blog inside your company you might understand this, because in the comfort (or not) within a more private culture, different things percolate. I first saw this at a customer, Ziff Davis, where they discovered an Art Director had the best writer's voice, and he went on the be the most popular blogger when they launched it on their public platform, 1UP. Not every Horatio has a blog, but at Socialtext we have our own little story.
John Horton started with us as an intern and is our sales ops guy. In fairness, there are better things about John Horton, but his blogging has gained a kind of cult following in the company. He is our Kafka, the everyday Dilbert, a man who speaks the truth.
John Horton was was cool enough to let me post some excepts. The meat of his posts are about our lead flow, and straight forward insights into how to improve the processes he is involved in, which I had to redact, but some what is sandwiched around it remains:
05/02/07
Not much to say really. I think I'm going to get Quiznos for lunch again.
05/03/07
Takeaways from the New Employee meeting: I thought it was a good, informative meeting that was probably helpful for everyone. The reasons for the blogging requirement were made clear. I knew nothing of how the weblog tool worked before the meeting, and now I do obviously. I'm honored that my initial attempt at a blog was made an example of. I've actually learned a lot over the past few days with my basic lessons in Wiki Gardening from Liz and then the meeting today. I'm improving in my wiki creating, editing, and navigating skills. I've also learned a lot simply by following examples from random wikis. It's pretty easy to pick up on the various formatting techniques by seeing how others do it...
In other news, today at Quiznos I had the new Peppercorn Parmesan Turkey sub. It was pretty good, but it seemed a little heavy on the Ranch dressing. While standing in line there, I've often wondered to myself, "If I was a sandwich, which sandwich would I be?" From my perspective, it's right up there with other profound questions such as "What's the meaning of life?" and "How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?". I'm going to think about it a little more, and if I come up with an answer, I'll certainly blog it.
05/04/07
Quiznos Sub of the Day:
Classic Italian
Salami, pepperoni, capicola, ham, mozzarella, lettuce, tomato, red onion, black olives, Red Wine Vinaigrette Dressing
Learned a new Quiznos-related acronym from Liza today. MOP = mustard, onions, pickles.
Frustrated with IRC. Downloaded 3 different clients, but still no luck joining "#social". Not sure what the problem is. I feel like I'm pretty computer-literate, but IRC makes me feel like an idiot. Griffon doesn't seem to be in today, so I'll talk to him on Monday about it. Why is Skype so easy to setup, yet IRC so difficult? The Trillian client installed a Weather Channel program on my desktop. Great. That's just what I wanted.
05/09/07
Quiznos Sub of the Day:
Honey Bourbon Chicken
Chicken, lettuce, tomato, red onion, Honey Bourbon Mustard and Zesty Grille Sauce
Best attention-grabbing news headline I've seen in a while: Angry Giraffe Teaches Drunk Students a Lesson. In all seriousness though, there is something to be learned from this news story. Don't provoke giraffes while intoxicated. Truly an important life lesson.
05/11/07
Quiznos Sub of the Day:
Classic Club
Turkey, ham, bacon, cheddar, lettuce, tomato, mayonnaise
...There was a fascinating and deeply philosophical conversation about tattoos in the office today between Jeff Harpell, Barb Hibino, and I. It was decided that if I were to get a tattoo, it would be a huge dead tree on my chest.
Super Weekend Plans: I'm probably going to sleep a lot. Maybe watch some TV. I was thinking of going to a store, but I'm not sure yet.
Quiznos Sub of the Day:
Oven-Roasted Turkey
Turkey breast, lettuce, tomato, mayo
Most importantly, I've been delegated the supreme responsibility of ordering Round Table pizza for Friday's Bugfest. I feel honored that such faith has been placed in me to accomplish this. I just hope and pray I have the determination and fortitude to complete this most difficult task.
05/16/07
South American Dictator of the Day:
Augusto Pinoche
It seemed like a natural progression to go from Quiznos to South American dictators.
Central America Dictator of the Day:
Anastasio Somoza Debayle
The noise outside is making my brain bleed.
(Editor: I'm skipping ahead here, and you are missing the good parts about a company party and learning that God is editable)
05/24/07
Fundamental Physics Concept of the Day:
Heisenberg’s Uncertainty Principle
There’s light in my cubicle now.
...My left foot would occasionally go numb the past couple days. I’m happy to report that it hasn’t happened so far today.
After careful consideration, I have decided to downgrade to Windows 3.1. I’ll also be using an old AOL embedded browser. I think this will increase my productivity and allow me to encounter far, far more bugs. I’m going to get Griffon to set me up with a 5.25-inch floppy drive. If anyone out there has an old monitor, I’ll need that also. I’m hoping for a CGA monitor, but I’ll take EGA too. Preferably with overheating problems.
05/30/07
Luxembourg Hill of the Day:
Kneiff
My Super Memorial Day Weekend: I went to Wyoming and sat on a bench for a while.
...There’s a big ugly fake plant in my living room. I’m not entirely sure how it got there, but it’s there. I hate it, but I don’t know how to get rid of it. I suppose I could set it on fire. My apartment manager has advised me against that course of action, but I’m still considering it. So, if anyone would like a big ugly fake plant, I’m more than willing to donate it. As long as it doesn’t require a whole lot of effort on my part.
So I noticed there was some controversy over Holly’s marketing e-mail
about the internet poll. Some people thought it would be spam, some
people thought it was lying to vote for Socialtext over other internet
resources, and some people thought Luke’s mom was cool. Let me just say
that I’m completely supportive of the poll, the e-mail, Luke’s mom,
spam, and lying in general. So vote for Socialtext: http://www.webware.com/html/ww/100/2007/reference.html
And tell your friends that they’re lame if they don’t vote for Socialtext too.
05/31/07
Secretary of the Interior of the Day:
Orville Hickman Browning
Late last night I received a text message from an unknown number reading, "Hey Guapo! This is Samantha!". As far as I knew, I didn't know a Samantha nor have I ever been referred to as Guapo. Confused and perplexed, I sat thinking for a few hours about the deeper implications of this event. I did not know this person and did not recognize the number, yet she had clearly sent me a text message. Why? Was this sent by accident? Was this sent as a joke? Who is Samantha? Who is Guapo? Why had I been the recipient of this confounding message? After pondering these mysteries for quite some time as well as doing a little bit of soul-searching, I came to the conclusion that nothing happens at random in the universe. This message was clearly meant to come to me one way or another. Even though I had not known it before receiving the text message, I BECAME Guapo once I received the message. Reinvigorated with a new sense of purpose and a feeling of belonging in the universe, I shut off the phone and went to bed...
06/05/07
Chuck Norris Website of the Day:
http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/
Diet Mountain Dew is horrible. Worst soda ever...
Update on the Guapo crisis:
So I received a second text message addressed to "Guapo" from someone I
don't know. This one reads, "Guapo, you there? trying to reach out to
you man." I think the most likely scenario is that I'm a schizo with an
alternate personality known as Guapo whose actions I have no memory of.
He sounds like a more exciting person than me though, so perhaps I
should just embrace the persona. If I continue to receive these
messages, I shall certainly relay them to everyone at Socialtext since
it's clearly an issue that is of high importance for every employee
here.
(Editor: I'm going to stop there. If you think John Horton should start a public blog, let us know. Quiznos, you should work the sponsorship angle. Potential employers, you will have to wait. Ladies, I hear he is available. And he is even nicer, productive and honest in real life.)
